The Biggest Fish in the Pond & Other Stories

Look around.


This is your environment.

Chances are, you’re a small fish, in a large pond. If you have a spine, you’ll want to remedy that unfortunate situation. But what’s this? People are holding you back? Well, who? List them.

You would be right in thinking these are your enemies, since that seems intuitively logical, right? They hold you down, or drag you back when you make the slightest progress (I refer to that Cornucopia of Knowledge that is Wikipedia ~ ).

See what I did there?

What did you just do, without even thinking? Clue – I bet it happens all the time.

You referred to a body of information controlled by a major company.

These companies; the Googles, Apples, Microsofts, Wikis, have a level of power over you that probably goes unrecognised most of the time.

Do a few experiments and run aspirational Google searches. The most common is probably . These people would rather resort to Google than get off their asses and do something productive. All 196 million of them.

Essentially, they have been made Google’s bitches.

Oh, I’m sure the transition was gradual, maybe you grew up on the stuff from childhood, like an information opiate drip. Is that any excuse to be so oblivious to the dominance of such huge frickin’ fish?

Names 5 other search engines. Now the number of times per week you use them. Hard, isn’t it? That’s because they’ve cornered the market. Google is the biggest fish in the search engine pond. Or ocean, y’know, whatever.

This stranglehold not seen since the likes of the Death Star filters down to every market there is. The people who you go to for shit you think you need. Apple has cornered the “young and dumb” technophiles who want to show off a pretty casing with awful specs and Microsoft has got the businessmen who need their software from Excel to Powerpoint by the balls.

It’s called 2 things usually: Dominance and Penetration.

Which is code for: Yes, we’re fucking you over, and you’re paying for the privilege.

Not even vague code, is it? Hardly the Matrix code.

Back to the Google example since this is easy as pie to demonstrate: did you know, do you know now, how much shit Google has on you? All those requests for information from the bastards? They kept it. Every single search. If they were to use this on you, how much would be utterly humiliating? From porn to music to more porn (hey, it’s the net!) these faceless corporations have servers packed with shit ready to take you down if you do anything to piss them off.

Some people have tried to blow this sorta shit wide open, but noone in power wants to listen:

This, from a company whose informal motto is Don’t Be Evil. I am not kidding here.

(Yes I see the irony of Wiki links, but fuck it do you know a better free encyclopaedia? Britannia isn’t getting a cent of my income.)

Now why would a company wanna touch the words Be and Evil?

Sure, there’s the Don’t. If you’re an optimist. Yet, the casual use seems a blatant mindfuck, is it not? What would you do if you owned a massive company noone can bring down yet and were collecting information even on many governments? Try to make everyone like you? Sure, you might. If you were really the biggest fish in the pond, you might piss off the people in the know cos hey, they can’t take you down!

Like an ironic slogan? Don’t be evil, perhaps? Just make it Don’t be evil when noone’s looking, and say it wasn’t you.

Their search engine is used by every major website. Why? They get the most traffic. Google is basically pimping out the net.

That’s why so many in power have their ears closed to the subject, as they’re probably screwing you over in another way too.

These people took photos of the world when nobody asked them to, control what you see on the net according to a mumbled code of ethics, and have some satellites so gigantic certain governments look on with envy. They’ve been known to fuck over China, this year… CHINA!

Sound like a nice little company, just trying to get by? Or a company trying to monopolise parts of the world using the Internet as ransom?

Note I’ve been using Google as example since they’re online so links are easy to find, but the other one I’d love to do an expose on is that motherfucker Apple. It irritates the shit out of me when you see them market the idea “Be different, just like us.” These people don’t care how you express your “individuality”, dude, and they believe you’re as much a “special snowflake” as the next douchebag willing to part with hundreds of dollars for a music player and thousands for a computer.

Since I feel like stopping writing now due to the fury and hatred coursing through me (and as that makes my posts less readable and more like long strings of swears) I’ll post a link to a great article at the end that sums up the shit I would like to blow open by bringing to everyone’s attention.

Also, don’t focus on small-fry people around you as enemies, since you’ve probably guessed by now, they’re just the slot machines at a casino. The same people you read about in stories like this

Rational Conclusion

It’s the guys with names but no faces that you need to lose sleep over. The owners of Google and others that hide behind pretty logos.

THE article;

Research it beyond Cracked if you think their site isn’t good enough. All the stuff they say is true. Frankly, I’ve hated Apple since I found out about that AAC file format, I mean wtf? God bless the hackers of the world, for standing up to this unconstitutional shit!

As a closing note, I wanna shout out my mantra for the piece.

Don’t try to fuck over the people around you. Fuck over people like Steve Jobs.

Or just,

Fuck Steve Jobs!

p.s. If you’re reading this, Steve, And everyone hates you. You’re right to be forever paranoid, you jerk.

1. Be civil. 2. Be logical or fair. 3. Do not bore me.

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