All the reasons men might send dick pics

Rarely mentioned are the cases when this is known to be inappropriate e.g. when one party is a minor, married or has stated their disinterest.

It does mention the reaction fetish but curiously omits such finer details.

One issue is that men just aren’t good at hearing, or responding to “No.” I’m not excusing that. But this same dynamic, that men think women are sexually as excited as they are, is getting in the way of men hearing the “No, we DON’T want to see that!”

Blame the feminists.

Many women are genuinely bothered by receiving such pictures and view it as an unwelcome intrusion.

It’s called modesty and men complain when women lack it.
I know plenty of modest women who avoid the gym purely because we don’t want to see other naked women at the changing room.

People who are offended and grossed out at such images would like them banned. They want men to understand that such behaviors are rude, unacceptable and should simply stop. Many women have tried attacking such men, flaming and shaming them, both online and in personal communications. But such strategies probably won’t work.

It’s illegal to flash someone, how is this any different? You’re still seeing everything.

A tenet of psychology is that negative reinforcement is still reinforcement. The more uproar, outrage and disgust that such pics get, the more powerful some men feel. They feel some pride that their penis generated this strong reaction. So, shaming, banning, flaming strategies are unlikely to be successful. A better strategy is to ignore it. I know that probably feels unsatisfying. But if we remove as much of the reinforcement, including negative attention, many of these men might view this behavior as ultimately unrewarding.

But they’ll know they’ve sent it and you’ve seen it. They’re still getting off on it. That’s sadism, because they’re getting off on causing psychological distress, a form of harm. Why can’t we outlaw unsolicited messages? A certain type of come-on is harassment but flashing them electronically is fine? What sort of contradiction is that? The law must resolve this. This applies to men too, young boys online and straight men targeted by gay men (and older, say, female teachers).

It’s important that women, and men, understand that this behavior, even when it feels distasteful and rude, is not personal.


It’s called target selection.
Men tend to go by hair colour and cup size.

It’s not actually about you, the person receiving these pics. This dynamic, silly as it can be, is not proof that men are disgusting perverts and women are prudes.

Preferring to see people clothed makes one a prude now?

This behavior reveals some core differences between men and women’s sexual personalities, and that men need to work harder at understanding women’s actual sexual interests and motivations.

They know exactly what they’re doing. They’re adults.

Personally, I don’t care what people do with their phones in this way, as long as you ask permission. 

Send 2 girls 1 cup for all I care, just ask damn permission first.

Of course women have a different reaction than men, we might be visual too but that’s the least aesthetically pleasing part of a man (I won’t make crude comparisons) and they usually look the same anyway, you can’t judge anything like size that might be practical or ‘prove masculinity’ (what a silly concept) and it can spoil any air of romance up until that point.

9/10 men send them because they can. It’s electronic exhibitionism.

So we should send them granny porn. Because we can.

1. Be civil. 2. Be logical or fair. 3. Do not bore me.

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