Do you see what they’re doing? It’s a little mental trick of wiping that dirt off the bad guy’s image and smearing it on the good guy’s.
The result is farce. Which easy to detect if you’re paying attention.
For, if an honest person were talking, someone who honestly felt the other party was at least somewhat to blame, he or she wouldn’t totally reverse reality this way.
This is how, for example, you get people characterizing the abuser as, of all the things, the victim. Enough to make the head spin. Getting things that backwards is no accident: it’s projection.
Key words used:
Real victim here
Responsibility (really used to mean blame)
claims of stupidity (innate) instead of naivety (circumstantial, easily forgivable)
if you X, you should expect Y (non-sequitur) e.g. if you wear a miniskirt, you should expect to be raped
“crazy” – hello gaslighting my old friend
why are you so angry? to derail and give them an excuse to call you irrational or irrelevant (tone policing)
it’s a conspiracy! e.g. all men everywhere would be happy if it weren’t for those meddlin’ feminists
That isn’t just wrong: it’s a farce. That exactly REVERSES reality. They are just playing the shell game with labels.
They question the agency of the attacker and claim it was magically reduced only for the duration of an attack, including verbal abuse.
There is always some form of prejudice between the person projecting’s demographic and their claimed victim (usually sex or race). As in, it’s automatically wrong to cross (group) and do (thing), and much worse than any other combination of victim groups. They ingroup with the attacker, because they identify with the attacker, whatever they do.
Over time, the same person will claim the same flaws in all the people they hate. In men, this is usually low IQ (acting like stupidity equates to evil, makes one a bad person and they deserve to be treated with cruelty) and in women, this is usually low SES (as if being poor is a bad thing, instead of the attitude you take to it).
Bitchy men will resort to stereo-typically bitchy gay tactics e.g. insulting looks while the same SMV as the person they attack. Butch women will behave like men, with male-patterned entitlement.
Projection is of course intellectual dishonesty.
An honest person may be wrong. But an honest person never reverses and makes a farce of reality.
False beliefs prevail e.g. my demographic is blameless and anything we did was justified (from Black Lives Matter to MRAs). Due to the toxic culture (conspiracy), the (demo) is always the real victim. Making it personal is the bulk of their reply, poisoning the well is the same as an argument. Appeal to ignorance – for the attacker.
Therefore, narcissists and psychopaths shouldn’t just be lumped together with the rest of the mentally ill. Indeed, narcissists and psychopaths can think quite straight whenever they want to. Their twisted thinking might be 100% willful or a habit ingrained from decades of willfy twisted thinking as a Peter Pan.
You are responsible for your own actions. That’s it. They will go on and on about responsibility – but only ever in reference to others. They will never acknowedge pure responsibility for themselves, usually a lesser charge superficially or with an excuse. They never run out of excuses. They conflate this with being rational. It’s rationalization.
Imagine a narcissist’s life as a road coming from way back in childhood. Now look behind him or her at the heaps of human wreckage all the way along it. All the playmates and people trampled. All the littler kids beat up. All the animals abused. All the marriages and friendships busted. All the false accusations that got innocent people punished. All the careers ruined. All the spirits crushed. All the credit stolen. All the abuse. That ain’t nothing.
Narcissists are people to stay far away from. All PREDATORS are. No one has to risk proximity to a predator: that’s the Law of Nature known as the right to self preservation. No professionally pious prig can morally obligate you to offer yourself up to abuse by remaining anywhere within a predator’s reach.
If the professionally pious prigs are so sure they’re morally correct, let them befriend the narcissist and fill that vacancy. Then let’s hear what they have to say.
Monsters tend to befriend one another.
This comment, they are exposed by time.
Narcissists and psychopaths don’t participate in humanity. They consider themselves different, above human beings. They consider themselves predators on human beings, treating us like we treat bugs. THEY do this. They CHOOSE to not be human.
It should be Humane Rights.
They have no humanity for human beings. They think human beings are disgusting. One I used to know, like to characterize the human race as spineless “sludge” he could crush. Stuff “made of cheap stuff” (= dirt).
They will sometimes claim to be misanthropes to give themselves an intellectual air. If they didn’t care about humans, why devote their entire life to seeking our approval? To leeching positive affect? Draining bank accounts (this is why women expect men to pay, leech test)?
Don’t insult him by calling him a human being.
Narcissists deliberately treat human beings inhumanly. That is one of those things that just goes right through expert brains like a neutron.
They do this because they think it makes them a god. You would insult them by calling them human beings. Predators don’t prey on their own species. Human beings don’t view all other human beings as lunch on the hoof.
Sadism is their sociality. They always feel the need to dominate and control. Random people, waiters, other servile roles to experts (including the shrinks themselves). “My opinion is worth more than your credentials.”
The only time malignant narcissists and psychopaths want to be regarded as “human” is when they are crybabying and making excuses for abuse to avoid justice when they’ve been caught. And they are laughing up their sleeve at any sucker who falls for that line.
Protection, cowardice, retreat.
Sexually, narcissists will be attracted to borderlines. A huge red flag for a narcissist is one who keeps attracting borderlines and is too dense to know why. It plays into their victim cover. Apparently, they also suffer child abuse, but somehow never ‘traumatic’ enough to seek professional help.