The Male Borderline: Commitment-phobes and Sex Addicts

It’s not that there are actually more women than men with BPD, it’s that we haven’t identified the ways it manifests in males, as pathological. We might have climbed on-board with the ‘male bashing’ some women have promoted, and assumed this gender had innate deficits when they’ve acted like “jerks,” but what’s often spawned our pejorative view, is aberrant behavior patterns in men with borderline traits. Does that rearrange your mental files??

A colleague who works almost exclusively with male borderlines, has told me that they generally present as commitment-phobes and sex addicts, which seems logical–for at the very core of borderline pathology, is an attachmentissue that starts in infancy, with Mother. This is addressed more fully below, under my subsection; THE WIZARD OF ODDS….

Seducing women feeds his narcissism, and fills his core emptiness–it’s his addiction. Since he can’t form solid/healthy attachments, he takes hostages. Make sure you don’t become his next prisoner.

They’re like a dog chasing a car.
If they got a good woman they wouldn’t know what to do with her, and probably dump her from fear or push her away to feed into his abandonment paranoia.

A lot of PUAs are said to meet the criteria for NPD. This is close to the truth.
In fact, they better fit BPD and they make the entire sex look bad (most of the negative stereotypes about men are based on the immature ones).

1. Be civil. 2. Be logical or fair. 3. Do not bore me.

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