IRL would also be helpful. Questions:
Is it something that might happen in a PSA?
Would you like men to speak like that to your sister or about your mother?
Is it from porn?
Bear in mind, women don’t watch that. Because we don’t like it!
Would you even find it in a trashy romance novel? *still creepy*
Would you say it to a stripper when a bouncer is around?
If you said it to a prostitute, would she be offended?
Could you get away with saying it at a cocktail party on first, second or even third meeting?
Do you feel like you got away with something?
Do you get a thrill after saying it, knowing it’s inappropriate?
Have you or would you ever ‘compliment’ a man like this?
And would that compliment make you look gay?
Do you understand there’s a difference between showing interest, no strings attached (no fingers either) and controlling the interaction?
Would you feel bad or embarrassed about saying this if your mother were present?
Does it include blackspeak and are you actually black? (if so, possibly OK, possibly)
Would your feelings be hurt more by the rejection than the thing you said to provoke it?
Is it based purely on clothing like hems or skin showing? (hookers do not have slutty uniforms, repeat, hookers do not actually have uniforms, if anything they dress like prudes so they don’t give the goods away for free, think about it)
Or is the clothing an excuse for noticing the figure she literally cannot help having underneath it?
Is she dressing for you? No, you specifically. That’s an excuse, isn’t it? How can you dress for someone you never met?
Do you know she’ll get offended before you say it, and still say it? Literally that’s what offensive means.
Do you get off by her negative reaction?
Women don’t like being verbally abused any more than men, so expect an equally vicious retort. If you think verbal abuse gets women off, you don’t know many women.
Do you try and spin this negative reaction as something wrong with her than ‘sexual sadism’ on your part?
Marriage proposals are less creepy than overtly sexual stuff, that’s how creepy the salacious stuff is. A Mills and Boon character would be demeaned to say it, do you see how stupid you sound? It’s like 50 shades of grey dialogue, stop.
Is it entirely about you and/or a body part? 100% creepy, whatever the context.
Do you look like a stalker? (you’re a stranger, nobody, so probably!)
Do you seem to think your opinion is relevant? (no)
Is this completely superficial?
Does this seem like the prelude to a date rape reconstruction in court? We can tell.
Is there an assumption she wants sex, especially as much as a porn star, and specifically with you (somehow), and are you stupid enough to explicitly tell her, random woman, this fact she supposedly knows, and show her up in public? Erotomania says what?
Is it inherently a demeaning remark? What if a man said similar to you?
Instead of complimenting her flesh, compliment her clothes. Literally never goes down badly.
Compliment effort- hair, makeup, perfume, strut.
If you don’t compliment freely, that isn’t a compliment, it’s an obligation. That’s creepy.
Women used to walk around near-nude in ancient times. Men behaved. Men have self control. If you lack impulse control and think this makes you more masculine…. women will run, but you’ll never figure out why.
Nobody wants to be stuck with rape baby.
You are not obligated to be nice to anyone or everyone and neither are we.
Imagine a man said and did the same thing. Would you be creeped out. Why? Oh, you’re not attracted to him, and cannot help that. At all. Huh.
Seriously. NO. VERBS.
It’s something the majority of creepy comments have in common.
Promise or threat? From a stranger, always a threat.
Order, question or comment? Comment – 50/50 creepy, depends. Question – if you’re OK with a No and will drop it, possibly acceptable as long as it isn’t sexual (could you say it on day time TV?). Order – no. WTF is wrong with you. That’s a sign of a personality disorder, that entitlement.
If you knew she was packing, would you say it?
Do you expect X for free? Is X attention? Where was this announced on the sandwich board? Unless there’s a free hugs sign, no. Why would you expect X, and on demand? Who do you think you are? Random, creepy, antisocial. Seeking validation from strangers is always creepy. Damn thot.
Affection is earned and it’s based on trust.
If you send an intimate photo without asking, she is allowed to post it online to a gay site, since you want everyone to see it.
Are you lovestruck on a daily or even weekly basis? Nope, that’s desperate horniness.
Do you see the woman/whatever as a walking sex toy? Always creepy, see a shrink. Really.
Why do we have to teach men basic social skills? If you get in legal trouble, you don’t get to claim hypoagency. Ignorance or pleaded appeal to exception feigned ignorance isn’t an excuse. Harassment is totally the fault of the agent beginning and conducting it.
Don’t be a lech. That’s what creepy is, lechery.