Even their normally blue-pill comment stream is largely not swallowing that BS. It’s about killing pets and pulling knives and false identities and pulling an ill baby out of an incubator. Better than the article actually.
First of all: don’t believe a damn word someone with BPD says without fact-checking because they’re chronic liars and often form false memories. Their personality and mere opinions change on a daily basis.
Here’s a less interesting true story because more interesting cases are complicated: I confronted a girl once with literal evidence she said something totally different to what she had claimed to complete strangers, I did this in person, in public view of those people [safety], and she repeatedly said she didn’t understand – as if she couldn’t read. Thankfully everyone else present saw through her. Finally. YEARS LATER. (Turns out she’d been going behind my back out of jealousy/spite/who knows and making out I was like a female Satan a la Bedazzled because I questioned her, kinda my role, so anything bad she did she’d pin on me to this group of people when I wasn’t around to hear). She couldn’t keep friends very long for some reason and I’d only stuck around her from pity but at that point I stopped seeing her on a professional basis anyway. Gotta have personal limits. She’s still pretending it was her choice and making up ever-changing but dramatic, evil stories about the reason, last I heard via grapevine. Typical feminist.
Part of their condition is playing victim you see – while ruining the lives of everyone around them. They are social poison. You can trace it back to the one “blameless” victim who’s weirdly seeming to get a buzz out of it, waving around the suffering of those they “love” – for attention and sympathy. As the commentariat point out, no, these people do not deserve my tea and sympathy, especially for free. They need a shrink and the new ones or those who don’t specialize are often fooled at first (like sociopaths’ charm). Asking a regular person to change their whole lives and ruin large chunks of it to accomodate one person is ridiculous. This isn’t care in the community.
#5. Popular Culture Writes It Off as “Crazy Bitch Syndrome”
“all versions of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders have indicated that BPD is unequivocally more common in women than men.” source This article doesn’t go into the rages and such.
They can’t even respond normally to laboratory neutrality: http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/borderline-personality-disorder/index.shtml “Studies show that people with this disorder may see anger in an emotionally neutral face5 and have a stronger reaction to words with negative meanings than people who do not have the disorder.6… One study found that adults with borderline personality disorder showed excessive emotional reactions when looking at words with unpleasant meanings, compared with healthy people. People with more severe borderline personality disorder showed a more intense emotional response than people who had less severe borderline personality disorder.6”
“It is not real, although she may believe it is” ~ premature declarations of love.
The article, partially written by a BPD “sufferer” tries to make light of it all;
Basically, you feel hopeless and lost, you look to other people for a sense of belonging, and you get scared shitless and act out at the slightest indication that they might take their affection away.
She makes it sound like a Disney film. I say she because the romance of that sentence and looking to another instead of themselves (they have no self, they’re hollow). Except note the subtler undercurrent. Don’t you feel like saving her, a little bit? Like no one understands her and she’s reaching out? Yeah, one sentence manipulation, that must’ve taken practice, by dialling up the volume on normal human emotions (like insecurity, fear of rejection, a part of life) but wait, if she’s so hopeless, why does she try all the time and if she’s so lost, how does she keep finding herself in the exact same situation? Applying logic like that to them in real life will trigger BPD rage.
#4. It Comes Down to “I Hate You, Don’t Leave Me”
They do know relationships are a two-way choice right? No, barely. They think if they snag you like a fish they can gut you forever and you aren’t “allowed” to leave. If you tell someone you hate them and act like it, they won’t take that as the actions of a loved one and even if you’re connected somehow, break it off (unless they have issues themselves).
Do you remember the relationships you had in your early teens, when the hormones first started pumping and absolutely everything was HUGE and DRAMATIC?
Wait, it has nothing to do with being a woman [claim #5] and you’re blaming hormones? See what I mean? No logic. Cos all teenagers are like BPD sufferers, mhm. Makes it sound relatable as a metaphor huh? Like they’ll get over it someday and be okay, if only you stick around for all the torture until then?
I fall in love whenever I look at someone for too long, but I’ve always been on the lookout for the next person since (according to my stupid brain), he will inevitably leave me.
See why I posted the fake-declaration of love thing?
They are incapable of monogamy, whose fault does that sound?
It becomes a sort of self-fulfilling prophecy.
Does that level of agency sound like someone too emotional to have control or legal criminal understanding of their actions? Sounds like she thinks about it a lot. Why? Probably gets off on it, or she would stop the constant searching for victims (they leave a trail of people needing therapy).
You see, staying single is not an option.
I can feel like the only way to protect myself is to reject people before they reject me, even if they weren’t thinking about rejecting me at all.
This is why I included the fake choice confrontation story up top. Yes, it was her choice to leave every single time. She was always first although that’s highly mathematically improbable given her number of social interactions.
It’s basically fight or flight, if your version of fighting would be grossly ineffective in most street brawls, since it mainly involves smothering people with your love.
“Love” includes threats and various domestic abuse crimes? Sounds like victim blaming to me. Note how she dismisses the possibility of her fighting anyone ever, because she’s a harmless little snowflake, like a lost puppy. Oh won’t you let her into your life?
#3. It’s Not a Female Disorder — but Society Thinks It Is
By society, do you mean the psychiatrists who consult for films like Girl, Interrupted? The journalists who report on the things BPD patients literally do because it’s their job? Is Cracked not a part of society? Where’re your credentials?
For many women, according to some scholars, a diagnosis of BPD is just this generation’s version of hysteria.
Are you saying it has something to do with sex now? Really? Almost like you’re making it up.
And the only thing that works on is called histrionic personality disorder, sure, don’t mention it, although it’s comorbid with BPD.
There appears to be no biological basis for the discrepancy
Oh, they’re trying to pull the misogyny card. Nah.
“Heritability of this illness is estimated to be up to 68%. …Current statistics also imply that BPD is more common in females…White females” source
Next they literally try to argue it’s PTSD. I don’t know enough words to describe everything immoral about that.
Male borderlines do exist, but they’re like female sociopaths in genuine (properly diagnosed) rarity. Unicorns. Evil unicorns. source “With regard to Axis II comorbidity, men with borderline personality disorder are more likely than women to evidence antisocial personality disorder.” Going by the illogic of claim #4, men can’t be borderline, evil society is misdiagnosing them when they’re actually sociopaths.
#2. There’s Not Really Any Treatment for BPD
I am genuinely surprised they admitted that. Truth in the saying: “You don’t treat a borderline, you ignore it.” Largely they pay to vent at you as if you’re a brick wall and walk away with happy pills that might as well be placebo candies. They enjoy bragging about taking them and showing off the bottle by accidentally forgetting it was left out etc.
Here’s where it gets confusing. We’re living in supposedly enlightened times in which no one blames the mentally ill for their condition.
Recall the story up top where the girl pretended she couldn’t read to get out of explaining herself? We know what’s ‘confusing’ to a BPD is a load of BS. Playing dumb is a common go-to tactic because it elicits sympathy and makes the other person look paranoid without evidence. Nobody does blame them for having a condition. However, using a condition as an excuse to abuse people and commit crimes or just making life hell around loved ones because it doesn’t make them suffer much personally, gonna get a bad rep. There’s having it, then there’s using it and relishing it. Where is all the stuff about manipulation rife with BPD? They threaten their own shrinks ffs.
But then there is a category of illnesses that are deeply entwined with an individual’s personality called — wait for it — personality disorders. These are a series of destructive behaviors and thought processes that are part disease, and part … just the way you are.
That was completely wrong.
Example: So do you suggest we ONLY TREAT the “diseased part”? If you have no stable personality, how can there be a “way you are”? If you deliberately fuck up your relationships, are you blaming your “disease” or your special snowflakeness, that without BPD you’d still drive people away? It’s completely unworkable and wrong and I feel like I lost IQ points just reading it.
-current guidelines do not recommend medication because none have proven effective.
Given that they have personal agency, full knowledge of what they do, and their bad decisions require the abuse of other people’s rights and needs by default, take a wild stabby guess in the dark about why that is.
I had to pretty much close down my business because I was having panic attacks every time I went in. I just have to try to take a buddy everywhere I go and otherwise avoid people as much as possible so I don’t have a breakdown over some little fucking thing.
Correction: this article DOES go into the rages, but it calls them “panic attacks” because that causes which emotional response when you hear it? I’ve noticed that a lot among the BPD crowd. It isn’t “rage”, it’s “panic” and it’s all your fault for doing nothing at all! It clears up when you give them exactly what they wanted (cashier). How odd.
It’s called a hair-trigger temper, like The She-Hulk, and the friend has the patience of a saint, or perhaps a sadist. Does this “breakdown” include breaking things? Damage to property? Hitting things? Lashing out? She never goes into detail… BPD is aka Emotional Regulation Disorder (ERD) – as that name implies, they can control it. Part of their condition is denying that fact. And who can prevent a panic attack? [commonly PTSD feature, what a coincidence]
With no practical treatment options, people who have BPD are at a sky-high risk for substance abuse
Well that was a lie. A complete lie. Substance abuse is often a factor in patient history, beforehand, the BPD doesn’t cause it. It’s part of a general pattern of high arousal thresholds (like a sociopath) and recklessness (like a sociopath) and not caring about your health for a rush (like a sociopath). Sex, drugs, alcohol, standing on cliff edges, whatever. BPD is also known as IMPULSIVE Personality Disorder. source
1. No One Understands, and That Leads to Fear
As a completionist, I will cover this section. I doubt I need to since my readers are intelligent.
Considering movies tend to portray us as violent stalkers (or at the very least, out-of-control whirlwinds of emotional destruction), it’s easy to lump BPD sufferers in with sociopaths or other groups that lack basic human empathy. But more recent studies suggest that we actually just have way too much of it. Since you’re constantly assessing the emotional state of the people around you (primarily because it’s all your fault, and oh god you have to fix it) [DS: probably your controlling fault yes], people with borderline personality disorder kind of have people-reading superpowers. That’s bad if it leads you to overreact, like I did at the grocery store, but it can also mean you’re the Stephen Hawking of interpersonal relations.
Reader test: Can you guess how much of that was bullshit?
[re-read neutral faces study above if needed, those were flat line drawings on a computer]
e.g. If you’re a super-powered empath, why do you misread and fuck up the one thing in life that requires empathy? That’s just insulting to empaths tbh.
What that means on a practical level is that we’re good at gauging the temperature of the room. We’re like emotional sponges. We can be great diplomats, really good at keeping everyone in the group happy, because we are self-appointed, full-time Keeping People Happiers. When someone’s in pain, we really feel that pain, so we’re an excellent shoulder to cry on. Everyone I know who has BPD is generally as warm and gentle as a blanket made of kittens. But there’s a Lord of the Rings-sized elephant in the room here, and it’s that all of those positive traits come with the caveat, “when we’re not in devaluation mode.”
Reader test: Can you guess how much of that was bullshit?
e.g. how fake is the worst person in a room?
I can quite honestly say that we can be the most intensely loving, generous people you’ll ever encounter, but we can also be impressively nasty and spiteful. When I tell people about my disorder, they get that look on their face where they kind of give you the side-eye and take a step back as if you radiate psychic dick spines, and given what the movies show, I can hardly blame them.
compare with all the shit about being misunderstood aka the whole article
1. BPD have issues taking responsibility e.g. you still blame a cashier for doing their job
2. suicide threats, big difference and injury causes a rush
And this is something that comes up a lot in Cracked articles like this one — the fact that it will be really hard for things to improve for people like me as long as society’s first reaction is, “Mental illness? You mean that thing that makes people murder? Run, honey, before she boils the dog!”
You honestly believe people should put their personal safety beneath your constantly changing unpredictable feelings? Ones that make you freak out and flip out in public spontaneously at terrified random strangers?
Wow. Just wow. I can’t top that for comedic value.
Reader solution: 99.9% of words out of a borderline’s mouth are bullshit. Sooner trust a politician. Always fact-check. Especially when you think you don’t need to i.e. they’re teaching you what BPD really is.