Why won’t women* wait until marriage?

TLDR: Because you keep rewarding marrying the whores.
*Applies vice versa too.

This question is absurd if you know the first thing about human psychology.

awkward-darcy

It presupposes you’d marry them.

I want so dearly to post a screencap breaking this to a lost comrade, who thinks marrying a feminist is a sensible prospect. Here’s the gist of that conversation.

Aren’t you a right-wing hypocrite? Since you’re settling with a feminist, plus she (clearly) isn’t a virgin? Despite how you think that’s the ideal model of society and previously thought guys who settled for less were getting cucked, in some way?

Either it’s the standard or it’s meaningless. You’re a literal virtue signaller.

*cue butthurt*

Well, logically, either it’s a standard or it doesn’t matter, but a lot of men keep selecting long-term prospects based on short-term dating needs then complaining why there aren’t more long-term types.
Like, you can’t sit around twiddling thumbs wondering why more women don’t wait, when the ones who sleep around get picked for marriage just as often or even more often.
Women notice.
The reward incentives are skewed toward the whores, regardless of what men ‘intend’ and supposedly ‘believe’ – they aren’t acting like it.

So it doesn’t matter what they say. Women know men lie through their teeth.

Like, they want a woman to wait, but they refuse to wait for her; the type to insist they ‘try before they buy’ (degenerate) – when they also want a virgin bride so, you tell me how that fucking works.

*cue rationalizations*

*nobody can explain to me how that’s supposed to work*

If men don’t shun the ones who get around in favour of the ones with better morals, they can’t say they care about those morals in ‘mother of their children’ material. It clearly doesn’t matter to them, materially.
Because women look at the role models who get the reward of commitment, and imitate them.

That is literally ALL WOMEN DO.

That’s what they are, role models.
They get the intended ‘prize’ by pretending to play the short game then using endorphins against men to blind them to the woman’s quality since they couldn’t ‘snag’ them without that doping.

It reminds me of the welfare principle compared to Don’t Feed The Bears.

Don’t marry the sluts. Unless you want to make more sluts.

Behaviourism, bitch.

This is quite hilarious and I already having a bet going with a mutual friend about how long this will last. I’m not altogether against it, because it’s clearly the only way he’ll learn his lesson.

And I no longer need to listen to any of his inane opinions on the societal cancer of feminism, it’s brilliant; I can simply direct him to His Wife. You’re in favour of feminism if you literally marry it. Protip for women: never let a man use you as an emotional crutch to relieve his SO. It’s good for him and neither of you.

Can you guess which category these matches fall into, given the wealth of research that partners need like-views on matters political and religious?

The Prisoner's Dilemma as Applied to Marriage game theory original

However.

I will post a single line of screencap because it made me almost fall over laughing.

usedup

Why?

His choice of words, not mine.

waistcoat-and-cropped-jacket

The utter hypocrisy of the signalling Right.
The fastest way to kill feminism is to destroy its signalling value. If no man ever married a feminist again, it would go back to being all lesbians. Commitment is the only card you have over us, don’t waste it!

It’s the ONE card men have over the modern woman, the Trump card, if you will.

It’s literally the only form of strike the feminists would ever truly care about, since it’s the only thing other women would care about, moving us either way. Calling them fat on twitter won’t work, see the song Dear Future Husband.

A good old-fashioned public shaming works, but while we’re shaming the sluts (male and female alike), what about the people supposedly on our team who marry them? Shouldn’t the shaming be greater, since they claim to know better?

You have literally fucked the supply and demand curve in the Marital MarketPlace (MMP).

That isn’t on women, that’s on the right-thinking men who marry left.

Stop telling women that God will give them a husband later if they delay marriage now

There’s a lot of sweeping assumptions here. There are less quality people. People. Men and women, but since most of aren’t bi, we tend to fixate on the opposite sex. However, due to economic factors alone, even the good ones aren’t getting established financially until their 30s, something Aaron Clarey covered at some point. Combine with other facts like dual incomes are needed based on cost of living, cost of children/a child being more than a house and especially if the woman earns a lot more, she needs to work part-time. There’s nothing wrong with men doing some childcare duties however, we’ve heard for years from men how easy and fun it is and I’m sure they’re mostly just as good at it. However, aside from culture (people used to marry in their 20s, not teens, to establish themselves socially) it’s a hard economic issue. It’s money first, then culture telling us the bachelor lifestyle is good instead of degenerate, and finally, the issue which cannot be rushed unless you want higher divorce rates – finding someone not just of quality, but someone in that already narrow band where you’re both good for each other and can work together, similar ideals etc.

They need to get married probably, but more important is to stay married.

There’s a heavy blaming tone in pointing the finger at women for what is The Domain of men. How many bachelors have you known that just gave up? That is pathetic. Such a person doesn’t deserve the title adult, let alone man. Is their behaviour not their own fault? Who’s got hypoagency now? And these are meant to be the strong community leaders we’re supposed to respect and swoon over? The guys parked in front of porn and video games, so inspirational. And often the guys giving out this advice mock the married.

Anyone delaying on purpose deserves to be alone. It’s the secretary problem. But that’s all the Have it All crowd. 

Imagine how a man and a woman from the 40s would look at your life. If they wouldn’t respect you, why should modern people? It’s a social kind of horseshoe theory where the women who disapprove of modern man the most are either feminists – or heavily traditional. Lumping the latter in with the former, don’t wonder why we avoid you for being too aspie to know the difference between criticism and penis envy.
Men do not deserve respect for existing, nobody does. What goes on between engaged/married people is their private business, these are adults we’re discussing.
The Peter Pan issue is real, I’ve heard a lot of young women bemoan the snowflake men in our generation refuse to grow up (and move into full adulthood). You complain that people can’t cook and other self-reliance, everyone should know those things, okay. But how many 30-somethings still act like teenagers? Is that acceptable? Where’s the shame? I bet the number of times you called them on their shit approaches ZERO.

It’s completely traditional to ask a biological man to man-up. Not to marry just anyone for the sake of it, and he controls the selection, not her, but at least start acting like an adult on most fronts. Is that SO much to ask for??

How is a woman supposed to date adult men when none exist in her age group? They may be biological adults, but psychologically they’re thirteen. How is he supposed to keep a family when he can’t keep his sock drawer clean? When will the men self-police and decide on some kind of common standard before bitching about how they’re entitled to XYZ in a woman, as if sperm is the more expensive, evolutionally valuable quantity here (we know that’s a lie and it puts us off you because you don’t get It) and as if women don’t commit more in our fertility (physically, literally) and in pure manhours (irony, we give up basically the rest of our lives, men have breaks from the home). Women follow men. No suitable men? …’Where are all the women’, they ask? Waiting for men to get their act together, that’s where! We shouldn’t have to tell you to be men, that’s how dire the maturity situation is. Mentioning this makes me very uncomfortable and that’s why I’m cautious not to be too specific because this is for men to decide amongst themselves, taught by living examples, not some conceited guys with opinions on marriage who can’t keep a girlfriend over two years. Find your role models who are living it and learn the only way that works.

I heard recently a guy made a stupid mistake and people said ‘aw, he’s just 21’ like he was 12! No, if you’re old enough to vote and die for your country, you’re old enough not to fuck up. The only reason we have special snowflakes is cos the culture keeps giving them sympathy instead of a slap from reality. Bring back adult standards – for all adults. Fairly common sense stuff.

Oh and those supposed ‘good men’ don’t want to commit anymore. At all. To anyone. There are 18yo ‘good’ men, who refuse to commit, like the feminists of yore, thinking they can play the field, Have it All, and scoop up the same quality woman just sitting around waiting for him like a bobbing duck once they’ve racked up STDs past their sexual peak (18 for men). Despite the weaker pair bonding/family loyalty offered by all types of sluts, inc men. Did I mention the rampant porn addiction too? Cos that’s cheating, the brain doesn’t know the difference. Men offer the commitment, that isn’t women’s fault. So it isn’t so much a case of when will the women settle down and your forefathers would’ve laughed you out the room for loading that question, as why won’t the men propose to anyone? What’s wrong with them or their life? Since men control the proposal, the lower marriage rate is directly their fault.

“And they think they’re entitled to some goody-two-shoes wife, that another, better man would otherwise be assigned socially?…

They think they can Have It All like SATC scum? This doesn’t happen, and a manwhore has a high divorce risk too. Nothing to do with the woman. You can’t be a player and settle down, they’re mutually exclusive lifestyles and mindsets. Your brain is literally wired differently. The studies show they’re dissatisfied whichever wife they do get because they’ve been spoiled sexually. Spoiled. Like an apple. Rotten.” source

Your question is wrong so you’re all asking one another questions about female psychology instead of actually listening to women. Sausage fest won’t tell you anything you dunno already. If you wanna intellectually masturbate one another, fine, go ahead, sorry to interrupt. However, your question’s false and loaded with incorrect priors. If you want something to chew on and resolve this problem than merely talk about it, listen up.
In sum, it isn’t Why won’t women marry men and follow their lead?
As it is;

  1. Why won’t adult men act like it?
  2. Where are the male role models living the dream?
  3. Why won’t men propose?
  4. Why can’t men keep a family?
  5. Why do men feel entitled to XYZ like a social contract and what is their payment due for receipt of these things?
  6. Why can’t a man find a woman who respects him?
  7. Why do men expect a woman who doesn’t fully respect him is a good marriage candidate and how much of the blame is his?
  8. Why don’t modern women respect the modern man and his lifestyle and what can be done to raise standards all around?
  9. Which behaviours are to blame for this and how does each sex contribute to these?
  10. Should we emphasize marriage for all, at what age, under what conditions, when is divorce permissible and what about everyone else? Should people wait until meeting the right One and how can this process of courting be sped up and how many children should married couples be encouraged to have and when?

If you ignore all those questions, no wonder you go round in circles like dogs chasing your tails.
Is bitching about people the respectable thing a Head of a Household would do? Knowing he’ll have a wife from that group and probably daughters? Would you respect that man?
A lot of these topics are an excuse to punch down (yes, down) at women and sound as bad as feminists.

There is no honour any more.
Men in particular lack poise.

Point to me a modern man with complete dignity.
Where is modern man’s integrity, as he insults women clubbing, but come Saturday night, guess where he is?

Turns out women with self-respect quickly lose interest in any man who negs them like a tart, degrades their entire sex casually and overall treats them like dirt and the cause of the world’s problems. Gee, I wonder why the bitter guys are single and only attract feminists….

WINTERY KNIGHT

Man helping a woman with proper handgun marksmanship Man helping a woman with proper handgun marksmanship

Dalrock blogged a splendid post about people who claim that there is a shortage of “good men”. He says that if there really were a shortage of good men, then people who want women to actually get married would be telling women not to delay marriage, but to instead get serious about marrying early, when their ability to attract a man is at its peak.

Dalrock writes:

We can see the same pattern in Dr. John Piper’s recent post Why Are Women More Eager Missionaries?*  Piper explains that missionary work has become a pink ghetto:

…the actual situation among most evangelical faith missions is that between 80–85% of all single missionaries are women. It is a rare thing, like two out of every ten, for a single man to make missions his life’s vocation, which results in the overall statistics being that one-third of those…

View original post 1,211 more words

Whites least likely to marry outside their own race

2015 USA data. The propaganda hasn’t worked.

http://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2015/06/12/interracial-marriage-who-is-marrying-out/

7%, same figure both men and women.

What’s the bet they’re low SMV and cashing their chips?
That they can’t make it with their own due to some defect or have that freaky self loathing going on? [Despite knowing their kids will still look like them.]
Not to mention the slavery fetish. You know that’s a thing.
Sometimes you can just look at them in the street and see that’s the thing.

laughing lol haha liar liar

We’re onto you. I love how the internet has pretty much established that white fat/ugly women marry/date black guys, but totally ignore the male data.

Like, guys, we have eyes.

It’s fine if you can’t make it with white women, not everyone can, but at least admit it.
Everyone else can see, believe me.

Men happier in marriage

http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/jomf.12077/abstract

If they controlled for social desirability bias in women, that would be significant. Moreover, few men requiring clinical treatment ever seek it e.g. ED, porn addiction, fetishes including a fetish for youth as part of a midlife/existential crisis. Men will be arrogant about their sexual diseases from perverse shame and claim what was called hyperaesthesia (high libido, excessive sensitivity and obsession) is a sign of potency, when it’s quite the opposite, it’s a sign of weakness and impotency. Put it this way: if no woman can satisfy you, that isn’t a fault of the women.

As Havelock Ellis said, strength requires repose and these men are neurotic wrecks, anxious about sex most hours of the day. Potent men aren’t obsessed with it, it has its place in private (no exhibitionism, no kissing and telling) and exhibit high self-control and high arousal thresholds.
Promiscuity and whoring by such men is narcissistic and hence, unfulfilling, the itch coming back stronger like an addiction, because they cannot connect with the opposite sex, it’s really masturbation with another/stranger’s body.

This study doesn’t fit very old findings when women were bound to the home (really what we’d now call false imprisonment) but in the context of modern intersexual relations it has a cause: balanced marital satisfaction is based on an even power dynamic. 

An even power exchange may be found in people who are not the same, it doesn’t require strict equality.

Women happier after husband dies
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/science/2016/04/22/wives-become-less-stressed-after-their-husbands-die-study-finds/

Physiologically, marriage is healthier for men than bachelorhood.

Happy wife, happy life is true
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2014/09/140912134824.htm
The man does have the romantic obligation to lead, that’s the masculine role, women often complain he treats them coldly (“He doesn’t try anymore!”, it’s like being friendzoned but with a legal obligation). This is the man’s fault and women are more liable to listen to his complaints in a good mood but pride constrains them. Modern metrosexual men complain their wife doesn’t initiate sex – like a porn star. Well, she isn’t supposed to, those women are acting and usually quite frigid (some type of misplaced libido, like male porn addicts). Impotence is a male issue, poor male performance is bound to make the woman feel offended.

Smarter women, no higher divorce risk
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2014/07/140724092816.htm

MGTOW is a good thing for the gene pool, the inferior quality husband self-selects out, it’s a eugenic effect similar to the ancient societies where few men ever reproduced.

https://psmag.com/8-000-years-ago-17-women-reproduced-for-every-one-man-6d41445ae73d

If they’re iffy about producing a child, they’re unfit to raise it. Same goes for women.

Age to settle = 26

http://www.techinsider.io/computer-science-says-the-perfect-age-to-get-married-is-26-heres-why-2016-6

Between 26-32.

Prior, 18-25, most prospects aren’t high quality (and presumably, somewhat actualized).

After 32, they’re so comfortable being single (and selfish) they cannot compromise for a spouse.

Sounds about right.

Lowest divorce risk. Nice.

Sure, great characters.

Married men are happier and why immature men fear commitment

webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:NNiSn2ChL3kJ:www.menshealth.com/health/why-married-men-are-happier
+&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=uk

“Think bachelors have it made? It turns out married men are actually happier after marriage than they would be if they stayed single, according to researchers at Michigan State University.”

“The results: “People, on average, aren’t happier following marriage than they were before marriage, but they are happier than they would have been if they stayed single,” says Stevie C. Y. Yap, a doctoral candidate in the Department of Psychology at MSU and one of the study authors.”

Do the red pill ‘men’ cover this? Nope, because they’re bitter bachelors. Health improvements too from the connection, but they’ll keep catastrophizing marriage as the death of everything good in the world, wedding ring as a guillotine. The finding is pretty straightforward, in an even choice, marriage is the superior option.
Tbh I also think there’s a slight confound for maturity here. Masculine, mature men are more likely to get married and be happy in their wise selection. Naturally, they have no problem finding a good woman, being a good man themselves. Or another angle, being married isn’t so great per se, but the type of person who is forever alone is a bad thing to be, by comparison.

Married men are also more successful, another myth busted.
http://www.boundless.org/blog/why-are-married-men-hard-on-bachelors/

Marriage gives you support and a purpose, it helps you mature even more. The nurturing of a wife encourages a man to be more masculine, it’s a paradox, as well as the dependence paradox (you’ll feel more independent).

Nothing wrong with never getting married, just don’t lie about it to prospective dates.

The modern man sees cohabitation as superior to marriage and any woman stupid enough to agree to it, naively and silently expecting it’s a stepping stone instead of the final destination, deserves to be played. They get everything they want out of the woman with none of the responsibilities and expense. Women have this sunk cost fallacy where they wait around for years on a man who never said Yes to long-term. If he gives any answer to the future question than an emphatic Yes, it’s a no. Vague half-answers are chickening out of serving the truth too raw in case you break up with him because he wants the sex. Also, sleeping with a man won’t make him more attracted to you, it’ll make him respect you less for long-term prospects. You know if someone is a long-term prospect after a month, probably less. You know if you want to marry someone after a year, stop kidding yourself.

lhj.com/relationships/marriage/challenges/afraid-to-commit-young-men-want-to-wait-on-marriage/?page=2
cracked.com/blog/the-5-reasons-marriage-scares-men-arent-what-you-think_p2/
Fear of intimacy and fear of making the wrong choice factor in too.
Some don’t even expect to be faithful themselves which is… progressive. Yet they want the wife to be, which is insane. Do they even listen to the vows?

On another note, a husband shouldn’t be honoured until he cherishes his wife. As always in marriage, the male leads the example.

psychologytoday.com/blog/fighting-fear/201304/why-some-people-cant-find-anyone-marry

“Most people regard marriage as liberating, although they may not stop to think of it in just that way…”
“But not everyone sees it that way. For some people, marriage seems as if it will be a constraint.”
Bad attachment style. Avoid. Avoided. They should never marry.
A lot of them get so accustomed to only thinking of Number 1, they resent cooperation. Consider that. They cannot share their life.
“If a man or woman thinks of marriage as unpleasant, it will not be possible to find anyone desirable to marry.”

applause clap clapping yes well done

The OCD fear of divorce is keeping Gen Y from taking the step.
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2011/12/111218150305.htm
Sure, live your life in fear, close yourself off to one of the best experiences in life, I’m sure the Reaper will understand. Never attend a job interview either, because your dream job may not be as great as you imagined.
If you actually wait too long, when you could‘ve married younger (as in, late 20s), then divorce risk goes up too.
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2015/07/150716141945.htm
People in their 30s+ can become selfish and entitled, and build up such ridiculous expectations of marriage, the spouse will always fail. “I deserve XYZ because I’m so special, I waited all this time for you, worship me or I’ll leave” as if it’s a bf/gf arrangement and leaving is a casual matter.
Educated women aren’t a divorce risk either.
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2014/07/140724092816.htm

People who confuse sleepovers with commitment.
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2011/07/110725190040.htm

When they fail at romance, romance is a terrible idea for anyone and they pose as cynical because apathy is sexy amirite, because the fault can’t possibly lie with them, can it? Not Secret King, surely?!

Naturally these findings will be dismissed by bitter men with confirmation bias sucking lemons that other men are happy. I wrote about this in the New to the Manosphere? thing.
Appeal to exception, anecdotal evidence, fantastical What Ifs…. and that’s why they’re single. Fault-finding and nitpicking like a shrew.
Those are not reasons, those are post-hoc rationalizations. These are not smart people.
Low quality men cannot pass the social tests to hit the status symbol of marriage and long-term rite of passage it is. They can hardly keep a girlfriend happy for more than a few months, let alone a wife. Social skills of a hog in a suit. They mistakenly believe one party is like a slave and they can take anything out on the other party, it’ll magically patch all their insecurities and heal them with the bathing glow of magical sex, I’m sure that fantasy will end without the cops being called…

Spoiler: If you bitch about an entire sex, you aren’t nice.

5 Reasons Why The ‘Nice Guy’ Is Actually An Assh*le

“So, when you accuse women of always going for the wrong guy, you’re implying that you know better than they do. You’re rejecting the possibility that they can make the right choice for themselves.”
Somewhere, the siren song of gaslighting plays.
Not only are these guys mind readers, but they happen to know what’s best for you, and it involves fucking them. This is a coincidence.

In bitching about how ‘stupid’ women are, they’re proving they aren’t nice.

You aren’t entitled to Miss Perfect. Nobody is entitled to another person.