Tasteful controversy. Nice.
I find it odd we fixate on the likes of Bond girls (Mary Sues mostly) when Bond is psychologically more disturbed than a woman trying to choke him with her maternal thighs or whatever. He’s the active party, right? You could accurately describe his adventures as The Wandering Ballsack. It’s the height of 60s Boomerisms, all he does is consume and fuck around. Nobody talks about it in the context of psychiatric issues except Craig who brilliantly, when asked if there was anything real men could learn from Bond and apply in their life, replied “No. Nothing”.
Bond is the epitome of a vapid man, who only cares about cars, clothes and indulgence. He’s late-stage Roman empire. This isn’t fucking Shakespeare.
Craig couldn’t be more different from him in real life if he tried;
Bond was skewered greatly by early seasons of Archer, Bond is so weak he can’t stop drinking “or the collective hangover might kill me”. Is bravado now the substitute for genuine toughness in men? Apparently so.
It makes memes like this really fucking cringeworthy.
It hurts to read this shit. All he does is shoot things.
Bitch, he couldn’t turn up to an office job at 8am sober.
Except for token gay subplots stinking up the franchise, am I right?
If that rings a bell –
Two can play at that fucking game. Hurts, doesn’t it?
If your role model has a completely hollow life, what the hell is going on?
I air-punched at him sticking up for himself in this one:
Amazing quotes from the man himself:
“Let’s not forget that he’s actually a misogynist.”
“I still think he wants to f*ck anything with a pulse.”
“…I don’t give a f*ck.”
He’s 100% English, we hate Bond as the American’s ideal of what a man should be. It’s Hemingway with a different accent, remember he shot himself. It’s a suit and a penis, how insulting. Fleming knew his audience were gullible for some vanity and validation and this was in the 50s, by publication date, supposed heyday of the real thing? We love Craig because he gets how ridiculous it all is. There’s practically a fourth wall break and a wink.
He’ll brain a guy with a kitchen sink and smirk at the camera.
The smirk isn’t “I can get away with this”, it’s “can you believe idiots look up to this shit”?
You can easily live like James Bond these days if you get into a lot of credit card debt. He’s Zoolander with flashy murder gadgets. He’s a massive special snowflake, the world needs him, specifically, to save it. Why not #006 or #008?
In general, in real life, most men aren’t special. They can’t even save themselves from a death spiral of degeneracy. It’s ancient wisdom the wastrel (hedon) has a wasted life, male or female (before you ask).
A role model for men is not a narcissist who goes around shooting people, that’s a TV news story set at a school waiting to happen. Nowadays Bond would be social media famous like old unhinged RDJ and on a public sexual harassment watch list. This guy literally interrupts a woman in her hotel shower, (he broke in) you’d never see that scene play out the other way around. My personal favourite is the almost autistic scene where he looks in on her getting ready, what if she was replacing a tampon or something?
Who looks up to a guy like that? Seriously?
Craig is sick of being treated like a massive jerk.
Could you imagine the boundaries he must have with other men?
There’s no way he wouldn’t be bisexual, don’t lie to me Hollywood.
A man who screws anything that moves is bisexual, it’s a fact.
He doesn’t even hit on a man, not even for work purposes to get info?
You go guy, right?
Statistically, it would be mostly Bond Boys, actually.
I picture Milo in the role, he fits well.
Male honeypots aren’t sleeping with women.
Oh but Monroe’s glamour is tacky, are you kidding me? At least nobody took that seriously, it was fun play acting. If you listen to her interviews she was intelligent. Picture up top, reconcile with her infamous, “If you aren’t committed, don’t bother” speech. These guys twist it but women know that’s the rationale. Women know their worth. Men are wasting their time on external objects and bullshit posturing, while calling the women superficial. I don’t know a single woman who wants to go into debt for a slightly shinier car but okay.