What is the cost of being an ugly man?

Since this topic is popping up again, I’ll indulge you a piece of new research.
The cost of being an ugly man?
$186k.
Yes, K.
The thing you won’t be after reading this.
Remember, if you’re offended, that must mean you’re ugly.


http://bigthink.com/dollars-and-sex/do-women-really-value-income-over-looks-in-a-mate

My students often interpret this result as saying that women really care about money, but that is not what it says at all$186,000 is a huge difference in income. If women didn’t care about looks and only cared about money, the figure would be much, much lower. This says that despite the impression that on the marriage market women really care about income, the evidence suggest that they also care about looks. They just care about income too.”

They care about not starving in the street after being abandoned. The fact it’s common this abandonment happens in our time is a bountiful supply of evidence that the fear is just.

Sample bias in the gold diggers versus everyone else. The pool wanting looks is all, the pool willing to overlook Darwinian fitness (good genes, high IQ correlates to good looks) for cash is a minority, and would that minority be faithful? Look at adultery stats, no. So really they do get both, just by lying about the looks thing to secure cash first. Most women are too honest to cheat, so they go right for the looks as long as he’s stable and sane.

Sex should not be confused with breeding. Marrying someone doesn’t mean breeding with them nowadays, in the era of the starter marriage. If they ask non-gold diggers about who they would breed with, in either sex, the number would soar because it’s critical to your baby’s health that they possess good genes.

Which sex invests more metabolically, again?

Ignore the lookism at your peril. Women naturally gravitate toward better-looking men (better genetic fitness) during times of hardship, for multi-layered protection. You want women to give you a chance? Fix the economy.

The manopshere won’t tell you things like this (and without twisting the findings) because they want shekels more than your wellbeing.

Link: Gaslighting in marriage – why it’s wrong

It isn’t purely men that do this but in a marriage, I’ve never heard of a woman doing it.

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/relationships/2016/01/20-situations-in-which-men-gaslight-women/

Those ‘redpill husbands’ claiming this is prosocial domination are covering for their antisocial, divorce-causing behaviour.

In a 1998 study of 130 newlywed couples designed to explore predictors of divorce or marital stability, marriage researcher and author Dr. John Gottman and colleagues, labeled this observed behavior of husbands — as “bat-em-back” — due to the force with which husbands automatically acted to cut off any attempts of wives to influence. To the researchers, this intentional behavior was likened to that of a baseball player at the plate, ever ready to “bat” a home run.

This and subsequent studies found that a husband’s “refusal to accept influence from his wife” — in effect, gaslighting — is highly predictive of divorce. On the bright side, findings also showed that a husband’s “acceptance of influence from his wife” is even more predictive of a stable and happy marriage.

Essentially he’s depriving her of her role, refusing to allow her to support him.
Well, if you didn’t want support, why aren’t you single?
If you hate the feminine, why legally and spiritually bind yourself to it?

Are the abusers honest about this fact? No.
Never. They’d lose control. You cannot cooperate with someone who wants to destroy you.
They don’t care about the marriage bond and they certainly don’t care about the other spouse.
In Biblical terms, they are letting the team down on the cherish part of the vow.

Naturally, the problem here is not male partners, rather the social conditioning that trains men to anxiously feel they have to prove masculinity on the basis of how different they are from women — and in general that means avoiding the “soft” stuff their female partners want, such as romance, nonsexual touch, doing things she wants or likes (without feeling emasculated), etc.

Anyone who does that whipped sound, you can tell they’re bad with women.
Love is a verb. Do or do not do.

Culturally speaking, we don’t trust that a baby boy will grow to become a man in the same way that an acorn becomes an oak tree. We expect men to be on guard throughout their lives to prove they are the “real” thing, and not “sissies” or “gay” and the like. And men’s fears are real; everyone is “watching,” male and female, ready to shame them to get back on track. (This shaming has intensified in last two decades.)

As Ali notes, gaslighting is a result of social conditioning rooted in a set of beliefs regarding gender roles and masculinity, such as that:

  • Women’s opinions don’t hold as much weight.

  • Women’s wants should not be treated as legitimate.

  • Men should never express regret when their actions have caused pain.

aka psychopath

Who doesn’t want to live with a psycho?

Geez, no wonder they divorce the bastard.

If they really believed any of those false beliefs, they would never, ever marry.
They’d rather die on the end of a shotgun.

I don’t think the men who do this realize – if we brought back fault-divorce, men would lose because dissolution is normally their fault. It’s a failure of EQ on their part. That’s also why they refuse therapy, they don’t want to change, like a toddler. They’d rather hurt/weaken or lose the spouse.

“Hamstering” explained as bullshit;

Because women are conditioned to collaborate and empathize, this tactic can send a woman’s brain into an exhaustive wheel-spinning mode of explaining, complaining, crying, begging, pleading, etc. (and women’s socialization leaves them more susceptible …),  and deceive a man’s brain into making several false, misleading (and unfortunate) conclusions.

Victim blaming, hilarious. Note that they’re fine around normal people though. It’s mere proximity to the loser who feels the need to throw around diagnoses like a Munchausen by Proxy (Woe is me because of them) that’s the real issue.

For one, they interpret the effectiveness of this thought control tactic to silence their partner’s voice as “proof” of men’s superiority, rightful dominance, strength and intelligence compared women’s, etc., and thus get tricked into relying on a tactic that harms their relationship, and gradually pushes their partner away.

They crave attention, spew bullshit, get what they wanted – but it’s the woman’s fault?
Amazing magic trick.
The dumbass doesn’t know he’s conditioning women not to provide him affection.

That’s a level of retard I’ve never seen.

In truth, gaslighting is a major obstacle to forming a healthy, vibrant couple relationship — emotional intimacy. For most female partners, for example, a failure to build emotional intimacy often means a gradual loss of interest in sex.

Literally the manosphere.

Women don’t want me – how is this their fault?

But while discussing their relationships, you can never, ever talk about them.

Guess the common factor.

Guess the problem.

Where are all the K-types? [good men, good women]

Has she been reading me?
This is basically verbatim what I’ve been saying.
You self-improve and you’re not entitled to anyone.
You don’t deserve a good person.
Good people are naturally attracted to other good people.
If they don’t want you – guess what. You’re not good enough. You’re likely aiming too high and don’t know your MMV.
My marriage matrix is one of the most popular posts.
It’s also common sense.
The worst one is when sluts want a virgin.
Seriously, WTF is wrong with you? What’s with the fetish?
What happens after the honeymoon? They’ll hate you even more than another slut would.

For practical K-virtues in a man?

This girl nails it.
So clearly, men try to disqualify and ignore her.
Obviously you need to be independent to ~keep~ a wife and ~support~ a family.
It isn’t shallow to say that’s the goal, it’s basic biology.
Your forefathers are laughing at you and weeping at your tantrums over the way the species operates.
It’s bare minimum. If you don’t have one set of ambitions, why have the other that can’t be supported on air?
It’s like wanting a sportscar and never saving money but dropping five figures on gourmet coffee per year.
Your problem is obvious as it is basic.

If you can’t look after yourself, alone…………

The idea women don’t have a right to describe to men what they demand in a mate is preposterous.
The list wouldn’t be shocking, basically good father material.
She should’ve bullet-pointed. Try to be…..(more)
If the answer would be “I wouldn’t want my father to be that way” it’s a bad thing.

Briefly, K-women are at more of a premium than ever. They can afford to be more selective than ever. If you don’t respect this, they made the right choice in rejecting you. And wouldn’t you really rather a woman say No than accept you into an unhappy marriage because you were available to one another, despite the lack of fit?

The woman trying to secure a man, any man like a leech… because her biology is screaming at her, isn’t a good woman, the one you want.

Men can’t really perceive lack of fit in a relationship, women need our EQ for this, the peahen discernment skills.

Men display, so be the best unique display of yourself you can be.
Then who cares if you find your swan? You’ll be developed, you don’t need an accessory, scantron wife of attributes XYZ to impress other men, man.

Word of advice?

Don’t be so blackpill and embittered.

Women run a mile. We know everything sucks but it makes you sound personally weak.

Don’t do the macho thing either.

We can see right through you and you can’t keep it up the rest of your life.

Actually, a list of Don’t Do (This) would be more useful.

Then they’d bitch at us more for telling them the truth – you can’t handle the truth!

Selfish people get divorced. Don’t be selfish.

Useful links
https://disenchantedscholar.wordpress.com/2015/11/08/the-simple-decision-to-marry/
https://disenchantedscholar.wordpress.com/2017/04/10/women-used-to-be-ladies/
https://disenchantedscholar.wordpress.com/2017/01/27/born-again-christians-are-the-worst-cucks/
Don’t think you can trick us, we’re not stupid.
The majority of child IQ is maternal IQ, do you want dumb kids?
https://disenchantedscholar.wordpress.com/2015/10/31/links-the-sexual-revolution-robbed-women-men-have-never-had-it-so-good/
https://disenchantedscholar.wordpress.com/2016/11/09/todays-women-yesterdays-prostitutes/
https://disenchantedscholar.wordpress.com/2015/10/15/where-are-the-real-men-where-are-the-good-men-dead-mostly/
“Men gave up first. They gave up on the white picket fence for a few easy lays”
https://disenchantedscholar.wordpress.com/2015/10/18/link-the-blue-pill-expectations-bubble/
https://disenchantedscholar.wordpress.com/2017/03/02/why-do-i-keep-things-simple/
https://disenchantedscholar.wordpress.com/2017/02/04/why-wont-women-wait-until-marriage/
https://disenchantedscholar.wordpress.com/2017/01/02/why-cant-slutty-men-find-non-slutty-wives/
https://disenchantedscholar.wordpress.com/2016/12/28/link-why-are-women-so/

Too much brain?

Look at all the vintage inspiration stuff.
Make a private pinterest board to start figuring out likes/dislikes.

Design the life you want.
Life design is crucial and really what self-improvement is all about.

Actually, why aren’t there any vintage man blog and youtubers? Vintage lifestyle, music, fashion, books…. I’d like to see that, it’d be good for men.

Start with artofmanliness.com 

Be the best man you can be.

 

Why won’t women* wait until marriage?

TLDR: Because you keep rewarding marrying the whores.
*Applies vice versa too.

This question is absurd if you know the first thing about human psychology.

awkward-darcy

It presupposes you’d marry them.

I want so dearly to post a screencap breaking this to a lost comrade, who thinks marrying a feminist is a sensible prospect. Here’s the gist of that conversation.

Aren’t you a right-wing hypocrite? Since you’re settling with a feminist, plus she (clearly) isn’t a virgin? Despite how you think that’s the ideal model of society and previously thought guys who settled for less were getting cucked, in some way?

Either it’s the standard or it’s meaningless. You’re a literal virtue signaller.

*cue butthurt*

Well, logically, either it’s a standard or it doesn’t matter, but a lot of men keep selecting long-term prospects based on short-term dating needs then complaining why there aren’t more long-term types.
Like, you can’t sit around twiddling thumbs wondering why more women don’t wait, when the ones who sleep around get picked for marriage just as often or even more often.
Women notice.
The reward incentives are skewed toward the whores, regardless of what men ‘intend’ and supposedly ‘believe’ – they aren’t acting like it.

So it doesn’t matter what they say. Women know men lie through their teeth.

Like, they want a woman to wait, but they refuse to wait for her; the type to insist they ‘try before they buy’ (degenerate) – when they also want a virgin bride so, you tell me how that fucking works.

*cue rationalizations*

*nobody can explain to me how that’s supposed to work*

If men don’t shun the ones who get around in favour of the ones with better morals, they can’t say they care about those morals in ‘mother of their children’ material. It clearly doesn’t matter to them, materially.
Because women look at the role models who get the reward of commitment, and imitate them.

That is literally ALL WOMEN DO.

That’s what they are, role models.
They get the intended ‘prize’ by pretending to play the short game then using endorphins against men to blind them to the woman’s quality since they couldn’t ‘snag’ them without that doping.

It reminds me of the welfare principle compared to Don’t Feed The Bears.

Don’t marry the sluts. Unless you want to make more sluts.

Behaviourism, bitch.

This is quite hilarious and I already having a bet going with a mutual friend about how long this will last. I’m not altogether against it, because it’s clearly the only way he’ll learn his lesson.

And I no longer need to listen to any of his inane opinions on the societal cancer of feminism, it’s brilliant; I can simply direct him to His Wife. You’re in favour of feminism if you literally marry it. Protip for women: never let a man use you as an emotional crutch to relieve his SO. It’s good for him and neither of you.

Can you guess which category these matches fall into, given the wealth of research that partners need like-views on matters political and religious?

The Prisoner's Dilemma as Applied to Marriage game theory original

However.

I will post a single line of screencap because it made me almost fall over laughing.

usedup

Why?

His choice of words, not mine.

waistcoat-and-cropped-jacket

The utter hypocrisy of the signalling Right.
The fastest way to kill feminism is to destroy its signalling value. If no man ever married a feminist again, it would go back to being all lesbians. Commitment is the only card you have over us, don’t waste it!

It’s the ONE card men have over the modern woman, the Trump card, if you will.

It’s literally the only form of strike the feminists would ever truly care about, since it’s the only thing other women would care about, moving us either way. Calling them fat on twitter won’t work, see the song Dear Future Husband.

A good old-fashioned public shaming works, but while we’re shaming the sluts (male and female alike), what about the people supposedly on our team who marry them? Shouldn’t the shaming be greater, since they claim to know better?

You have literally fucked the supply and demand curve in the Marital MarketPlace (MMP).

That isn’t on women, that’s on the right-thinking men who marry left.